This Post is Definitely, Absolutely, Positively Not About Mike Pence

  I don’t normally jump on the latest topic that’s flying around on social media. And I’m not going to jump on Mike Pence. (I mean. I’m a pacifist. Jumping on people is frowned upon.) What I do want to talk about is something I’ve mostly seen people talk around instead of about. Some people believe that men and women should never be alone together. That…

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An Online Conversation With My 17-Year-Old Self

In 1998—the era of screeching modems and dial-up speeds we thought were lightning fast—I was one of a few people I knew who had a home internet connection and their own website. When Geocities closed down, I thought my teenage website was gone forever, but thanks to Internet Archive’s Way Back Machine, it’s still out there, kicking it late-90s style. I was an opinionated little thing…

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How to Train Your Christian

  Christians, while fun and loving, can present many challenges. Proper training is the key to a happy and healthy Christian. Obedience Training There are two commands that every Christian should learn. Down – This command is often difficult for Christians to learn because of its submissive posture. Leave It – This command is vital, though many trainers neglect it. Do not shy away from…

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For the Ones Who Can’t See the Light

Dear You, I know. I know what it’s like to trudge through knee-high snow, in the woods, at midnight, without a coat, during a blizzard, and squint through those icy bites, looking for that warm candle light that will lead you home, but there is no effing flicker of light out there. OK. Maybe I don’t actually wander the woods during a blizzard, but I think…

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The Spiritual Gift of Shutting Up

  Have you ever taken one of those spiritual gifts tests? You answer a few multiple choice questions and the test suggests which spiritual gifts you might have. And then you compare your gifts with your friends, while pretending to be all humble about “leadership” being your spiritual gift. Next, comes the argument about whether or not those pesky charismatic gifts still manifest today or…

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#Triggered Jokes

“Sherlock sucks.” #Triggered He posts it as a joke. He’s making fun of all the little internet kiddies who use “triggered” when they really mean “I don’t like that thing you just said.” But those little internet kiddies aren’t reading his comment. I am. And those kids misappropriated that word from the people who need it. Those kids aren’t triggered. They’re irritated. They’re offended. They’re…

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Mandatory Year-end Blog Post 2016

2016 started rough. I was still working on the first draft of my memoir, and writing a book is hard, y’all. This is the hardest thing I’ve ever done (and I once managed to get my car out of a snowbank using nothing but McDonald’s bags). I feel like a wizard should show up to tell me I’ve fulfilled my destiny or some shit. Except I’m…

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I’m Just Getting Warmed Up

One of my cousins posted this Medium article today. I’m not exactly crying, and the language goes a little further than I would sometimes, but yeah. A lot of women are feeling this right now. I’ve been the most competent person in the room, but was interrupted and talked over by men who didn’t know what the hell they were talking about. I’ve been the…

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